Valid-ditty of St Val's Day - Ken Boddie - Australia

Ken Boddie

4 years ago · 2 min. reading time · ~10 ·

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Valid-ditty of St Val's Day

I must admit that I've never subscribed much to St Valentine's day. I find it hard to climb aboard the concept that some priest (or arguably bishop, depending upon the data source), who lost his head at the direction of his emperor, should be the reason why we should reveal, review or repeat our vows of never ending love to our present partners or potential partners of choice. I mean just what has a churchman got to do with chocolates, tulips and cherubs with darts? And why are we so fascinated by the same churchman who refused to support mad Claudius II's belief that the battle fodder force elements of his Roman army couldn't perform their slaughtering duties efficiently if their heads were filled with languid and sensually alluring day dreams of their bedtime partners? Perhaps my following ditty will serve to confuse you further?

The priest we call St Valentine was doubtless very good,

The patron saint of lovers, fits, and those who nurture bees,

But pray do tell me why the fuss, and please don’t think me rude,

If sending flowers, cards or chocolates fills me with unease.

You see my Scottish heritage has made me rather frugle,

My better half will verify I only spend when needed,

And so I turned for evidence to ‘old mate’ Dr Google,

To help me formulate why Feb 14 should not be heeded.

It seems when Emperor Claudius II, gave out a new command,

That Roman army soldiers should abstain from getting wed,

Our Father Val continued giving them a helping hand,

By tying the knot and licensing their entry into bed.

For this our Claud was not amused and locked Val in the slammer,

To stop his fornicating fighting force from being mislead,

Perhaps St Val thought Claude’s reaction somewhat of a clamour,

Until Claude had him beaten, then, to boot, cut off his head.

Now just what has this story got to do with valid-dity,

And why we celebrate poor Val when February comes?

The only ones who benefit from Val’s death, more’s the pity,

Are those who sell us chocs and flowers, and all their retail chums.

So the next time that someone asks you, "Will you be my Valentine?", why not show them the door and let them know, in no uncertain words, that you like your head mounted firmly on your shoulders, "Thank you very much!"

....................<<..................>>...................

When not researching the weird or the wonderful, the comical or the cultured, the sinful or the serious, I chase my creative side, the results of which can be seen as selected photographs of my travels on my website at:

http://ken-boddie.squarespace.com

The author of the above, Ken Boddie, besides being a sometime poet and occasional writer, is an enthusiastic photographer, rarely leisure-travelling without his Canon, and loves to interact with other like-minded people with diverse interests.

Ken's three day work week (part time commitment) as a consulting engineer allows him to follow his photography interests, and to plan trips to an ever increasing list of countries and places of scenic beauty and cultural diversity.

#Val #Claude #St Valentine #St Val #Day

Comments

Fay Vietmeier

4 years ago #25

Ken Boddie You are funny my friend ;~) We should post your little poem around before the "negative holiday"

Ken Boddie

4 years ago #24

#27
And thank you, Greg, for stopping by.

Greg Rolfe

4 years ago #23

Thank you Ken!

Ken Boddie

4 years ago #22

#24
That would explain, John Rylance, why the most popular composers are all dead. 🤣😂🤣

Ken Boddie

4 years ago #21

#22
You may have highlighted the ‘root’ of the problem, Fay ... Now what’s that you say? Too much tooth decay? From eating those candies on Valentine’s Day? This makes me distraught, With bank balance naught, I guess I must eat foods that won’t give tooth rot.

John Rylance

4 years ago #20

#23
I agree with the sentiments of your two part post. In defence I would cite General Booth of the Salvation Army "why should the devil have all the good music (fun)?"

Fay Vietmeier

4 years ago #19

Ken Boddie Kevin Baker John Rylance Lada \ud83c\udfe1 Prkic (part 2) I have come to believe that knowing the history -foundation - the roots of a "holiday" IS important We should question AND teach our children to question: "what exactly am I celebrating ... and how? Does this live up with what is right & truth? Weigh the "heart of the matter" and decide whether to ... or how to participate or let the day pass by as just another day Celebrating LOVE is a beautiful thing ... and should be expressed in "thought-full" ... ways ("One Rose") breakfast in bed ... endless ways to express caring & love throughout each day ... not bound or expressed in one day of "Valentine" (which is purely commercial) How insightful & true Lada: "with independence we would get even more dependent? :) This condition FAR exceeds Croatia ;~)

Fay Vietmeier

4 years ago #18

Ken Boddie Kevin Baker John Rylance Lada \ud83c\udfe1 Prkic Thanks for the redirect Ken "humor in truth" is equally true. There seems to be great desire in our world for humor ... not so much for truth My blueberry "ditty" was directed at the hearts of children in the style of Dr Seuss ... but BIG kids also seem to appreciate the blueberry adventure https://www.bebee.com/producer/@fay-vietmeier-pennsylvania/bee-my-valentine-blueberry-banter-blueberry-blues I even mention "I've not much to spend" so you have company ;~) Halloween ... I call a "negative holiday" and think should be called "National Support Your Dentists Day" ... so much double-mindedness in our world ;~) (as a child though it seemed "fun" to create a costume (from nothing) and get candy (which truly was a "treat" when I was growing up) continued...

Lada 🏡 Prkic

4 years ago #17

#20
I've just tried, but it didn't work. 😂🤣

Ken Boddie

4 years ago #16

#19
Just in case you want to get rid of 'capitalism', Lada, the easiest way is to remove the 'caps shift' and the 'shift' keys on your keyboard. 🤣😂🤣

Lada 🏡 Prkic

4 years ago #15

#18
I'd like the idea. :-) I forgot to explain in my previous comment that I was referring to Croatia. We "replaced" socialism with capitalism almost 30 years ago after declaring independence in 1991, and "imported" all consumerist wonders along with it. Who could have known that with independence we would get even more dependent? :)

Ken Boddie

4 years ago #14

#17
Perhaps, Lada, we could make an exception, but only if 14 Feb was to be the day to display, give and eat those beautifully decorated licitar heart biscuits/cookies/cakes? ♥️♥️♥️

Lada 🏡 Prkic

4 years ago #13

Ken, I can only say that Valentine's Day is one of the American consumerists invented holidays we have imported along with capitalism. Good to know you share my thoughts about the whole concept. :)

Ken Boddie

4 years ago #12

#14
I must admit, John, I had to look up brassica, but talking of the days of prohibition, there are some who'd say cauliflower should be banned.

Ken Boddie

4 years ago #11

#11
Or is it humour in truth, Fay? As Queensland is relatively free of bunnies (they are formally a Class 2 pest) our commercial spinners have invented the Easter Bilby. “There's nowt so queer as folk” as they say in the north of England.

John Rylance

4 years ago #10

I have shared this elsewhere. A Punster called Sigmon Blackwell came up with this valentine pun. His local Indian Resturant had this dish on its menu. Spice-roasted cauliflower, about which he said "St Valentines Day brassica."

Ken Boddie

4 years ago #9

#10
Glad to be of service, Jerry Fletcher, along with old mate, Dr Google, of course.

Ken Boddie

4 years ago #8

#9
Thanks, Debasish.

Fay Vietmeier

4 years ago #7

Ken Boddie Jerry Fletcher Kevin Baker So true the "holidays" that are "celebrated" ... founded on myth or dubious roots /perpetuated ... marketed even tweaked by those who benefit usually financially (especially in recent decades) Drives home that GREED has grown (most surely in my lifetime-which would include you fine bees) Christmas Valentines Easter bunny I often think God looks down & shakes His head Funny poem Ken ... truth in humor ;~)

Jerry Fletcher

4 years ago #6

Ken, You've cleared up one of the mysteries I'd decided not to investigate...another ridiculous holiday with dubious beginnings. Thank you, I think. And so it goes.

Debasish Majumder

4 years ago #5

Ken Boddie lovely buzz! enjoyed and shared. thank you for the buzz.

Ken Boddie

4 years ago #4

#6
Just called my old mates, Santa Clause, the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy. They'll be popping round to see you soon, Kevin, to prove you wrong. 🤗

Ken Boddie

4 years ago #3

#3
Hey, Franci\ud83d\udc1dEugenia Hoffman, beBee Brand Ambassador ... I’m glad that your day was so happy, With fine beer and Italian bread, But I trust that your spouse isn’t Roman, And you won’t end up losing your head. 🤣😂🤣

Ken Boddie

4 years ago #2

#1
More a quatrain (abab), Paul, than couplets (aabb), but, hey, there's no time for pedanticism when feasting on chocolate. 🤣

Paul Walters

4 years ago #1

Ken Boddie Never a true word spoken !! And in rhyming couplets no less!

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